Mystery solved & need advice
 

Hello all,

Allow me to vent and whine in here, for those who know about my stories, here a little update which I just found after 1 year.

After I appeal with HDb with single owner appłicant, it's have been approved, I brought over my ex gf share and return back her cpf, now I found out that she apply a bto with another guy on July, omfg lol, my 6th sense told me in the past that I have been betrayed and 3rd party came into our relationship. Finally now I got the mystery solved. Is the same guy that when she was drunk and wanted to go his house at wee hour. She told me she dont want settle down and still want to play yet she apply bto.

If you have been betray before, i'm sure you don't like to be betray by your love one.

So I have a advice for you, please stay faithful with your love one.

Enough venting.

I need some advise for this coming Sunday.

I have a new gf for 3 month ++ and we are pretty loving, have been discussing 3 year later get married, open join saving account for our holiday honeymoon, ofcause we had some agreement, I have been invited for parent visiting this coming Sunday. It's the most stress thing ever, more stressful then your work. But I'm sure I can pass the interview. I just need some advice from bros here, how you prepare yourself for parent visiting.

I'm tieing down for this relationship.

Thank you for your time :)

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Hope this helps bro

Its most important that 2 of u r mentally matured & want to settle down, enuff of partying, then yes, plan for it. But 3 months into a relationship & talking abt joint accounts to me is a wee bit to fast. Remember, when u marry a woman, u marry her family too. It's a package deal. Since this sunday is ur 1st visit to their folks, it shows u still got some grounds to cover before u seriously plan for more.

This tells me that this is ur 1st meet the parents session. No need to act, drama or carry bolls. Just be u. Dun b stressed, just go wif the flow. Chit chat...b natural.

My advise for u is go wif the flow. Yes, 3mths is VERY SHORT as still honeymoon stage. Slowly dude.....get to know ur gal inside out, her family members etc etc. This is how u SECURE a marriage. Too much rushing into this 99.99% will lead to heartache n disappointments bro. Ai zai, slowly but surely;)
See my siggy,
是你的，就是你的。
不是你的，不要抢！
So if she's THE ONE, pak see buay zao wan bro

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

I'm always a faithful bf, just don't understand why ppl still cheat when they are married. Once I'm marry I will love her and my kid. Ofcause see gal still will lah. That normal. See no touch !

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

bro,

i may do the following for parent visiting.

1. buy a gift, a nice simple gift.

this is normally overlooked? often we go to our friend's house for fun, chit chat, drinking, mahjong (i dun gamble but i join for friendship sake), watch movie etc etc.

you are visiting formally and should buy this. be it a fruit basket or some wine and so on...a must. die die must. impression last. not only first impression. will also mean that you have better parenting etc.


2. be presentable.

dressing to outward appearance to not putting too much perfume. pls trim your nostril hair...haha :D no dirty clothes please. iron them. cut your nails.


3. be yourself.

don't be too nervous even if you are. your gf will be there to help you. talk to her and ask her about her parents and whoever that will be there? tell her your panic/stress...i am sure she will laugh it off and assure you :) just be yourself on actual day.


4. mind your manners

elders will no doubt tell you off in a way or two. take it in your most gentlemanly stride. it is ok....be humble and take it. after all, life is about ups and downs. this is just a little start. maybe a test too? be open about criticism and when you receive compliments, thank them. do not argue at all.


5. post visit (before you exit)

thank them for their invitation to meet and dine (if any). tell them you will like to visit them again if they permit. hold your gf's hand while saying it? and be it good or bad, thank them.

if you and gf plan to go out after that, tell them you will take gf back safely just like how you used to, always. assure gf's parents that their daughter will be well protected.


good luck bro. :)


winter.

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Agree wif wat d bros said. For me, 1st meet ups r basically a intro. Should keep it short n brief to minimise d voids btw conversations, yet, formal cos they r ur gf's family. Home dinners r perfect cos it's a cosy, comfortable setting for everyone. Dressing wise, just be neat n smart casual to fit into d setting. And of cos, 礼多人不怪。Gd luck, ts.:)

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Bro, pls post this same thing after u been married for few years... :p

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

TS bro, the best is just to be yourself, dont ever act out as someone else just to please another person and when they see the real u there's gonna be a lot of explanation to do, lol.

good luck and all the best!

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Of cos u dun understand la....cos u not married mah......
Come see ur post 10yrs after ur married & answer urself.
Then u will know y :D

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Really good advice

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Most parents want good for their daughter, you just need to project a good image, and show that you had a good job/career, guy with great aspirations. Gift and presents are just formalities. Just make them comfortable to hand you their daughter's future. Just be a loving couple in front of them.

Marriage is take two to work, both must be committed to this relationship.
It was never a one sided affair. She must show that she is ready for it too.
Good relationship most of the time would take time to nuture, to develop bond and faith in each other, and build trust.

Let time be your judge. 3 months is way too short to gamble your lifetime.

Would you like an instant porridge and slow-boiled porridge, which would taste nicer and more nutritious?

Invest more time to this relationship, I would hope to see that this relationship would blossom and rosy for a lifetime, for you two.
You had my blessings..

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Don't talk too early boy boy. If you're a faithfull man then what are you doing in a sex forum?

Do a background check on her parents, what they like or dislike & suck up :D

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Show concern to you future in laws (hope its all success and sweet) as you will be their half son after you gotten married. Please find out what they do from your gf and other taboo subjects that you should not ask or accidentally ask when you met them. Most people judge a person liked a cover of a book so please be presentable. ;)

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Fyi, I came in here to make friends. Not all guys who always think of sex.



Anyway the parent cancel the meeting.

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

Thanks bro for all the advises, appreciated, last week meeting her parent cancel as for now don't need kan jiong.


Why I would want to tie down with only 3 month?

1st - she love me more then herself
2nd - she is younger then me by 7 years, she is much more mature think then the gals I know in my entire life.
3rd - she don't Chiong and drink, same as me
4th - she surprise me whenever she can.
5th - she want to support herself rather then use my $$
6th - she don't want any wedding dinner because she think is waste of $$$ but I insist is a need.
7th - she don't mind to wait for me when I have not finish my work.
8th - we open a saving account for our future honey moon, one party is not allow to withdraw any $$, we wrote down out T&C for legal.
9th - she think for me more then she think for herself.
10th - she willing to learn cooking because I tell her at least need to know some basic cooking, not for me but our future kid, ofcause I can cook so no worry if wife can't cook.
11th - we talk / discuss anything under the sun.


Ofcause she have some - point, but I will be there to support and guide her


All the above point is truth that why I'm tying down myself.

Re: Mystery solved & need advice
 

bravo :)

good catch then...