Quote:
Originally Posted by SingViet
Bro, don't mind me saying this. She marry into yr family and you are Chinese , why need to follow the viet way of doing things and still pray to their ancestors ? Maybe I have too much pride , I have never prayed to my wife's ancestors from marriage till now, my children also. I always tell my children they are Chinese as I am Chinese. After birth, my wife follows Chinese tradition , not Vietnamese tradition.
|
I can only say ... YOU is YOU , ME is ME ... To each its own ...
I believe there is Nothing Wrong in doing some things in a vietnamese ways and I also believe there is nothing wrong in respecting/praying to their ancestors ...
That's where the problem lies:
In general, We want them to do things our singapore ways , pray and respect to our ancestors and YET we are not willing to do things in a vietnamese ways, pray and respect to theirs ... I think something is WRONG somewhere in our thinking adn/or perceptions.
I guess it is NOT a matter of Pride .... It's a Matter of RESPECT ...
So what if we are chinese ? so what she marry to me ?
Marriage is a 2 way thing NOT 1 way. It's a form for mutual respect NOT just for 1 party.
I also taught my 2 gals to be respectful , NOT to distinguish who is who ...
For me, as long as it benefit to both party .. which ever way, I am ok ..
Furthermore, during pregnacy ... child birth ... birthday ... she and the baby is there ... so they practice the Vietnamese way of celebrating ... so I guess it's nothing wrong with it ...
Besides, I also share with her the Chinese ways of doing things ... this becomes a journey for us to discover each other more and then we can learn to accept each other ways of doing things ... it's definitely a win-win situation for both ..
Sometimes I think of it, although in SIngapore, we dun really practice the Chinese way of doings things and celebration, we by in large follows the western way of doing things and even in celebration... so how can we called ourself as Chinese.
The MOST IMPORTANT Sentence I want to share is .. NO MATTER what circumstances , NEVER Forget Your ROOTS ....