Sex Addiction can cause bankruptcy

[diablo69]

Originally Posted by kcpro

Chapter 1: How it all started and the escalation spiral

One a month: (sgd 200 per month)

My first adventure with commercial sex actually started on an overseas trip. A few colleagues were posted to London and we lived in the suburbs.
There were brothel houses nearby that my colleagues had discovered by looking at newspaper ads.
A few of us went together and I lost my commercial sex virginity to a polish girl.
After than was into white girls and tried this a few times (one a month), white , Punjabi and Russian girls . Was paranoid as fuck about stds and so everything was capped.

Once a week (sgd 500 per month ) : Returned back to Singapore and sought the same thrill, Jalan Besar was my haunt , the PRC brothel houses at Kitchener road and the Malaysian health center at what is now Hotel 165. The prc brothel houses were thrilling with fresh new girls each week. Most of them green and wet.

This continued until I started dating my now wife and I stopped for a good year. She was my angel . After marriage we were strolling at orchard road and I gave into temptation with the excuse of just look look see see and strolled around cuppage plaza. Ended up at level 4 and full was on the menu. Was serviced by a Malaysia girl and that felt surreal. For the first time I had experienced what cheating felt like. I think it rewired something in my brain . I had cheated on my marriage and felt guilt for a month.

Thrice a week : ( sgd 1500 per month )

Over time commercial massage parlors and sex became a form of escapism. At the slightest stress I would seek commercial sex as a recourse. At the same time bad habits started to acrue - lying to my wife about my whereabouts (with friends or jogging ), seeking or planning about my next adventure, constantly using WeChat nearby and other apps to find MLs or someone horny.
This is about the time I had “success” on apps in finding women who were keen to explore . Started going on dates , spent lavishly on meals and gifts , would create and illusion of romance and have sex by the 3rd date.

Renting my own bachelor pad (sg 1500 for rent + another sgd 1500 on meals and gifts)

This is where the debt spiral started , banks were happy to open cash and credit lines and loaned out tons of money. My excuse to take them up was only to pay off existing credit cards . However instead of controlling my expenses it only gave me an opportunity to spend more . I now had my own bachelor pad and could bring girls over whenever I wanted . I still didn’t stay overnight. Housemates would look at me in fear and disgust, they knew the only time I visited was for long and loud sex sessions. PRC fuck buddies who I had met online on apps would use the place for a few days during their sg visits . I chose to ignore the costs , I was effectively living two lives. The cognitive dissonance wrecks your psyche and you get torn away from reality and your social life and family life suffers. Although I still managed to maintain a couple of friends and hold on to my marriage.

I have almost the same problem, I tried to stay away from one month, after that I will find my way again to fill that lust and temptation. I do have a great friends, gf and family. But the other side of me, I really hate it but at the same time I always give up the moment of impulse arrived. I wish I just go back in the time to stop myself for going the first of this messes.

It's really hurts after deeds. I hope TS or anyone can share how they overcome. The things I did was
1. Try to delete apps that could triggered like Facebook, michat, telegram and so on.
2. I try to install app that can block any sort of porn related.
3. I did exercised but makes me more horny for some reason
4. I do have a gf, but after 2 years, we have to be in long distance relationship. She is my angel. I hope to changed myself in the next year when we get married.

I am sorry if my English is not good. But I just wanna get some help, like anything to stop this. Thank you for reading.